Oxymoron |
Explanation |
Act Naturally |
What is natural? |
Adult Adolescence |
Adults acting like
kids. |
Almost
Exactly |
You're
getting close |
Arrive
early for your
Doctors Appointment |
Have
you ever not waited
for your Doctor? |
Bitter Sweet |
Which
is it, bitter or sweet? |
Predictable
Black Swan |
Clearly
Ambiguous |
Classic New |
A
new antique. |
Clearly
Ambiguous |
It
is clear we don't understand |
Constant
Variable |
My
wife on the phone |
Cruel
Kindness |
How
can kindness be cruel? |
Deafening
Silence |
So
quiet, you think you're deaf. |
Double Solitaire |
Real men play poker |
Exact
Estimate |
Send
a check for the amount. |
Half
Full |
An
Exact Estimate of a cup of coffee |
Half
Naked |
I
hope it's a girl. |
Honest Mechanic |
Every one knows one |
Legally
Dead |
Members
of the BAR |
Hells
Angels |
Dante's
girls |
Jumbo
Shrimp |
Big
little Shrimp |
Microsoft
Works |
Does
yours? |
Military
Intelligence |
What
is intelligent about war? |
Non-conformists Unite! |
Group of people going
different directions. |
Paid Volunteer |
A smart person |
Pretty
Ugly |
Something
like coyote ugly |
Resident
Alien |
A
Martian living in Mexico |
Rich
Trucker |
If he was rich, he would not be a trucker. |
Safe
Sex |
Unless
you're Bill Clinton |
Searching aimlessly |
Would you recognize it
if your found it? |
Senate Ethics Committee |
Clearly
Ambiguous |
Ship-Trap
Island |
I
don't get it either |
Standard
Deviation |
Probably
an Exact Estimate. |
Successful
Suicide |
Sounds
like a failure to me |
Suicide Victim |
How is this a victim? |
Sweet Tooth |
What does your tooth
taste like? |
Tame
Cat |
Same
as a welfare cat -- wants food. |
Tough
Love |
Love
is usually tender, not tough |
Vaguely
Aware |
A virtual reality |
Voluntary Deportation |
Sounds like a vacation. |
|
Who Ordered the Jumbo Shrimp?
And Other Oxymorons
by
Jon Agee (Illustrator)
Reading level:
Ages 9-12
Hardcover - 80 pages (October 1998)
Click on
title to read reviews or order this book |
|
|